FIND YOUR IDENTITY, NOT YOUR LABEL | People of the Second Chance

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By Mohan Karulkar:

There was a time in my life when I resented being called a nerd. Back then, it was synonymous with teacher’s pet, overachiever, and curve breaker. I felt isolated and alienated by that little n-word. I was trapped in a box.

Fast-forward to college, and that label started to take on a different meaning. “Nerd” started being synonymous with words like focused, driven, and high-potential. I got scholarships, which lightened the financial load. I was a pretty good tutor, which made me kinda popular. I found other “nerds,” and we embraced the label. We took it back. This nerd you cannot chain!

Except…we were still chained. There were clothes we didn’t wear, music we didn’t listen to, sports we didn’t play, girls we didn’t approach, bars we didn’t go to, majors we didn’t pursue…it goes on and on. We had a bigger box … a nicer box … but it was still a box. The sky wasn’t the limit.

The thing is, embracing a label and making it your own doesn’t change the fact that it’s still a LABEL — that falls far short of describing who you really are. I mean, we don’t actually believe that one word, or two, or even three, can fairly describe the entirety of a man, do we?

So to all you (us) coffee snobs, hipsters, Jesus-freaks, and Skyrim geeks: I think it might be time to cut it out. The labels, no matter how empowering they may seem, will always be the walls of a box. Labels make you less of a person, not more.

Don’t find your label; find your IDENTITY. It’s not to be found in adjectives or nouns, but in things intangible ─ things that are universal and timeless. Things like love, and faith, and relationship, and art. Things you sweat over, bleed over, even die over.

If you MUST name it, pick the one on your passport. Let your life speak for itself.

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http://mikelehr.wordpress.com/ Mike Lehr

“Don’t find your label; find your IDENTITY.” Love that! Thanks for the challenge Mo.
http://www.tonyjalicea.com Tony J. Alicea

Come on, bro! Preach!

I loved this! Miss your writing, homie. It always encourages me.
Jack Lynady

Fun read.
http://twitter.com/MikeFoster Mike Foster

great post Mo! love it!
http://sandysandmeyer.wordpress.com/ Sandy

Mo, you say the best things!
http://faithchaser.wordpress.com Margaret

This was actually the topic of discussion at my group last night. I brought the “Labels Lie” campaign to their attention and the ensuing dialogue encompassed those labels which we have internalized – just as you have written here. When we take a label lobbed at us with intent to wound and embrace it…is this behaviour healthy acceptance of the truth, or is it taking the “sword” away from others before they can spear us, or is it a way to make others “comfortable” – it’s okay for them to feel that way because we do?

If I call myself fat – am I accepting a truth and negating the power, fear and hurt the word holds or am I further reinforcing the negative opinions of others and repeatedly damaging my spirit?

The group in question, which not a weight-loss group or program, is focused on weight and the issues which surround being overweight – how we go there, why we stay there. As a result, our discussion was focused on weight-related labels, but I would submit that the same questions apply to any label we have embraced. (Drama Queen comes to mind in my life.)

I think it is a “God-incedence” that you chose this topic for your post today. You’ve done a very good job articulating the dilemma. Thank you. It is good to know I’m not alone in this quest for truth.

Proud to be POTSC with you.
Anonymous

As a “geek” who also enjoys reading, poetry, camping, and many other non-academic pursuits, I can relate 100% to this! Life has become much simpler since I’ve stopped being a label and just started being Logan instead.
http://www.mohan37.com/ mohan37

Glad to hear it Logan!
http://www.mohan37.com/ mohan37

Totally. I love when stuff lines up like that. I’ll probably bring it up in my own SG sometime. Proud to be POTSC with YOU
http://www.mohan37.com/ mohan37

lol thank you
http://www.mohan37.com/ mohan37

Thanks Mike!
http://www.mohan37.com/ mohan37

I’m a fun guy.
http://www.mohan37.com/ mohan37

thanks man. You’ve been a huge encouragement to me too.
http://www.mohan37.com/ mohan37

Anytime Mike!

Nov 30